Eyes half open
Mind semi on
Off to dreamland in an instance
If i shut my eyes..just for a second
I'll be gone
Shut
They closed...my eyes
Even though they closed I'm still awake
Still semi here, wherever here is
The real world
I guess
Not drifting from cloud to cloud
Of sugary goodness
that can only exisit in my dreams
...inside my little big world
The only thing that's changed is
My eyes are closed and it's dark
Mind is still floating
Thoughts
Ideas
Questions
And contradictions
All just floating...and overflowing
All of this up in the air in my head
And with all that space
I can't believe it's overflowing
Leaking from
...everywhere there is a hole
Ha holes (laugh out loud)
But it's overflowing
I don't know what to do
First thing that comes my mind
release
Release it all
Lift the switch and open the door
But ha to nerveous
Too damn scared to say
To deal with the consequences
Of the words
that I would be transporting
To the ones it concerns
Too damn afriad that I'll hurt them
To afriad that my words really...
...are like daggers
Rather than soft lilies
Even more afriad that I'll lose them
People speak that bullshit
that true friends
...people you love never leave
But then again
maybe not many of the people I call
"true friends"
Are that by definition
And if so then they'll leave...
Even though from that I know alone I meant nothing to them.
For them to be that soft that weak just cus of my honesty.
But still it will hurt and make me sad for a while...a long while to get over
So Instead of speaking my mind
I'll just keep quiet n stay with in the shadows hiding a part of me once again
And just exploded when I can't hold anymore
Be spread all over
Start fresh again
I'm use to this routine
But as of now I'm still semi here
Mentally
Emotionally
Physically
Just half here
Eyes now half shut
Cus it's too dark
And keeping them shut
Doesn't do anything
Shit
They're shut
I'm gone
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